The quick and dirty
Content warnings: Body-shaming, possibly implied slut-shaming, impatience/entitlement to people’s time.
Archetype: Knee-jerk asshole
General feel: The general consensus was that this guy is annoying as hell and hilariously bad at comebacks, but he seems pretty harmless overall.
He “Superliked” me on Tinder, and I thought I’d swipe right and give him a chance. My profile clearly states that I’m polyamorous, which (as you’ll see below) comes as a surprise to him. The entire conversation is in the section below.
The bullshit detector
The guy superliked me and then was like, “Hey! Hi! Hello! How are you? Where are you? Why aren’t you answering?” and so on within less than 12 hours of us matching. So the guy was definitely on the annoying side to start with. But the Annoying Man isn’t an archetype, really. It’s just par for the course most of the time.
He definitely should have read my profile, but I have a sneaking suspicion he never even bothered to. The fact that he was put off by my polyamory when it’s literally the first word of my profile (I’m not exaggerating) is kind of hilarious in and of itself, which is why I put the laugh react, but that he felt slighted by that shows a huge lack of self-awareness. He became the knee-jerk asshole and started flinging…dad jokes?…as comebacks. All right, then!
This guy ended up unmatching me just after sending these final messages and I’ll likely never hear from him again. Silver linings!